Why Canadians Need To Vote In The Federal Election May 2

As you may or may not know, Canada is going to have a federal election on May 2, 2011. That's in like 2 days, guys. This election is very neatly straddling the line between "stupid" and "super important". Mostly it's stupid because we keep having elections and nothing has changed, and super important because, well, maybe it will.

There are all sorts of reasons not to vote, especially for young people. Politics can seem like this alternate reality in Ottawa where men in suits are really boring and money disappears and what exactly does it have to do with me? Maybe we don't realize the extent to which it does have to do with us because it feels like politicians aren't talking to us, aren't making policies for us, and just plain aren't taking us seriously.

Figuring out who to vote for and how the voting system works can be confusing, especially since most of that isn't taught in school. The Globe and Mail has a pretty decent rundown on the major parties and their policies, where you can compare their platforms. If you're not sure which party you align with the most, CBC has a vote compass to help you figure it out. If you're doing it and you don't understand or know which policies the questions are talking about, then that's a really good reason to look them up to see where you stand on these issues. Just because you're young doesn't mean you can't understand politics. Here are the ridings in Quebec. Find your riding, see who's elected now, see which way its leaning, and what's going on.

++

Elections Canada breaks down how our voting system works. Here's a quick explanation:

Canada's parliament is made up of two bodies: the Senate (appointed) and the House of Commons (elected). The government is made up of the House of Commons, ie, the people we elect. Canada is divided into electoral districts, known as ridings. One person from each party can run for election in a riding, as well as independents. We, the people, vote for one candidate in our riding. If that person gets the most votes in that riding, then they win a seat in the House of Commons and represent that riding as an MP (member of parliament).

Our Prime Minister is the leader of the the party with the most seats, or MPs, in the House of Commons.

So, for example, in my riding of Pierrefonds-Dollard, Bernard Patry of the Liberal Party is currently my MP. If everyone else in Canada elected a member of the Liberal Party to the House of Commons, then Michael Ignatieff, as leader of the Liberal Party would be our Prime Minister.

The system is a little bit messed up, in that we don't get to directly vote for who we want to be PM. If you happen to be in a riding that is extremely Conservative, then your Liberal vote doesn't actually go to the Liberals. Not to mention that the left is split into 4 different parties. This is how Stephen Harper was able to win a minority government in the last election despite the fact that about 60% of Canada voted for Not-Harper.

There are 5 major parties running in this election: the Conservatives, the Liberals, the Bloc Quebecois, the New Democratic Party, and the Green Party.

++

The Conservatives

Leader: Stephen Harper

These are some of my feelings, re: Stephen Harper:

+ Shitharperdid.ca

+ He wants to spend $29 billion on fighter jets

+ He wants to build more prisons despite the fact that crime rate is going down

+ He has filled the government lobby with pictures of himself

+ etc, sorry can't provide an unbiased review of Harper & the Conservatives

The Liberals

Leader: Michael Ignatieff

Some things I care about re: Ignatieff & the Liberals:

+ learning passport: $1000 a year tax free bursaries for post-secondary students (for 4 years)

+ cares about our environment - especially cleaner oil sand development

+ possibly introducing online voting?

+ youth hiring incentive

+ apparently care about women

+ is not Stephen Harper

Bloc Quebecois

Leader: Gilles Duceppe

To be quite honest, I find this party kind annoying. They take a fairly liberal stance on most things except that they want the separation of Quebec and Canada, which is basically reason enough for me to not vote for them. Aside from that, they will never have enough votes to become the government of Canada, though I understand the need for "Quebec to be represented".

The NDP

Leader: Jack Layton

Jack Layton did a good job in the debates for this election and is gaining a lot of popularity in Quebec. Here is part of the NDP's platform:

+ hire lots of nurses and doctors

+ $800m transfer to provinces and territories to lower tuition fees.

+ reinstating federal minimum wage (actually not entirely sure what this would do)

+ climate change accountability act

+ ELECTORAL REFORM!!! but also they want to abolish the senate. not sure how I feel about that yet.

+ Be not-Stephen Harper

The Green Party

Leader: Elizabeth May

My parents said that Elizabeth May should be the leader of the Liberal party and that sounds like something I can agree with. The Green Party is a lot bigger in BC than it is in Quebec. Also I find it weird that the Bloc is invited to debates but the Greens aren't.

+ The Green Party is much more committed to the environment than any of the other parties, it is the foundation of their platform.

+ establish a $10 minimum wage

+ "$400-millon annual increase in funding of post-secondary education needs-based scholarships and bursaries"

+ reform the electoral system

+ are also apparently the only party to have a budget (it's at the end)?

+ not Stephen Harper

++

This is basically information I have gathered from each party's website in about 10 minutes. But don't trust everything I say! Reading and getting at least a small grasp on where each party stands doesn't take a long time, and you want to vote for what's important to you, not what's important to me. So one more time, here's the vote compass and here's the Globe's comparison of party policies.

This is what I have to say to people who are not voting: Why do you live here? Why not live in a place where you don't have to vote, like, say, China? I'm sure you enjoy your rights and freedoms here in Canada. Well, so do I. Just because the system might not make perfect sense, however, is not a reason to not vote. If you really think it's that stupid, then spoil your ballot. But don't sit at home not caring, because this is your life. Don't throw yourself around like you don't matter, because you matter, okay? And you know what? This is my life too. This is my country, too. So when you don't vote, you're taking a little piece of it away from me.

Remember When We Marched For Equality In October?

This one time in October 2009 Autostraddle went to Washington to march for equality and we're still marching, but separately, like we march to the bus stop and to the grocery store and to the living room, etc. I was there and I took pictures and then 7 months later I took more pictures with the same roll of film and so they were all double exposed which is sometimes really nice (see: san francisco) but in this case it just made me upset and I couldn't deal with it until now. It's convenient because autostraddle is having a party called RODEO DISCO 2: BACK IN THE STRADDLE and I know you're all excited to go and maybe these pictures will make you more excited!

If you're curious, some of the pictures are mixed with other pictures from Washington, some from this time I took my friend's dog for a walk in the snow, and the time Laura came to Montreal in May.

If you want to use these pictures for something, anything, please credit me. I might post the rest on tumblr so keep looking for that, and maybe on flickr but probably not 'cause I can't be bothered.

The One Where I Have Feelings About "The Marriage Ref"

Due to a recent obsession with Tina Fey and through word of mouth (read: twitter), I have come to hear about a show called "The Marriage Ref". Without ever watching this show, I could tell you that IT IS THE WORST SHOW EVER. WTF.

If you don't know what The Marriage Ref is all about, let me tell you: there is a "referee". There is a married couple. There are 3 judges -- two guests, one Jerry Seinfeld, creator of this monstrosity. The married couple have a fight. The guest judges debate the issue. The "referee" makes a call. Someone wins something. No, just kidding, this is a show where humanity loses.

I tried to think of reasons why someone as smart as Tina Fey would agree to be part of shit like this. My opinion? Seinfeld was once on Tina Fey's show 30 Rock. Now she's returning the favour. Plus, they're both with NBC. Maybe this isn't why she did it but I'm going to pretend it is because it would hurt me if Tina actually wanted to be on The Marriage Ref. Like I would be personally hurt. Kind of like when Penelope Cruz signed the petition to let Roman Polanski off for rape. Really, Penelope? Whyyyyyyyyy

The Marriage Ref doesn't do anything helpful for anybody (the issue isn't even resolved at the end). In fact, what it does is reinforce gender stereotypes and showcase failing marriages at a time when people like Maggie Gallagher are trying to tell us that "marriage is a sacred institution".

[While we're on the topic of marriage, I'm on a rampage because I've been reading "opposing viewpoints" on homosexuality for my moral issues in law class, and some of that stuff is so infuriating. Burman Skrable argues that the sexual revolution has allowed it so that people have sex for pleasure instead of just procreation and that now marriage is not all about having children when really it should be. I have a few things to say: a) we let old people get married. b) we let infertile/impotent people get married. c) we let people who don't want to have children get married. d) we are overpopulated. Estimates are that in 50 years we will have over 9 billion people on this planet and we cannot sustain that many people. Also, I feel like Burman Skrable a) never gets laid or b) if he gets laid he hates it because his homophobia is probably just repressed homosexuality.]

I really didn't want to watch The Marriage Ref. I'm actually mad that Tina Fey did this to me. And though I planned to watch it and never tell anyone ever, I was actually SO MAD that I had to write this blog post and therefore admit that I spent 42 minutes wanting to stab myself in the eyes. Just to see Tina Fey, hoping that maybe, maaaybe it wasn't as bad as it sounded. No, it was the worst thing ever. I would rather spend the rest of my life watching Ghost World than see 5 seconds of The Marriage Ref [I hated Ghost World]. But, watching it gives me the authority to judge it. I watched it so you don't have to! You're welcome!

See, it was 4 couples. The first couple were arguing because the husband liked to get manicures and pedicures and shave his chest and generally be clean or something. The wife didn't like that. BORING STUPID STAB STAB STAB. Wives should have a lease, like cars! You should be able to return them after a certain amount of time! Hahahahahaha! And Seinfeld was like "metrosexual, what is that, like, a third gender?" STAB STAB STAB MYSELF IN THE EARS. Gender does not equal sex. Gender does not equal sex. Gender does not equal sex. There are a lot of different genders. Like a lot.

Also; Tom Papa whatever the fuck his name is -- not funny. Worst host ever.

The second couple made me the most angry. The wife bought a diy porch and the husband couldn't put it together and that made her mad so she was like, you're a man you should be hardwired to build things and put porches together

Are you serious, woman? I suppose she also wants to put on her apron and stay in the kitchen and bear children and get rid of her right to vote? Does she leave the house without her husband's permission? stab stab stab stab

Oh hello 21st century, I did not see you there.

Third couple -- the woman flosses in bed. OMG I DON'T EVEN CARE SHOOT ME IN THE FUCKING FACE

Fourth couple -- he takes off his wedding ring to play basketball. He sucks at basketball. Tina Fey says she can take him one on one. I say I will take Tina Fey one on one but not at basketball.

This show looks like it's scripted. The arguments look fake. The arguments are fucking stupid. These couples look like they're not even communicating with each other. Why can't the woman help her husband build the porch? She can't read? She doesn't have arms? I almost recapped this episode except I couldn't bring myself to watch it twice. I can't even bring myself to go back to check if my quotes are right.

What is the point of this show? It doesn't offer solutions to fighting couples, it's just supposed to make us laugh because some woman flosses in bed and some man likes to get his eyebrows waxed. It's not funny. I wanted to kill myself. The Hills is better than this show.

I can't believe this is the "sacred institution" they call marriage. Can we please get rid of this show, and let gays marry? thanks.

Also, Tina Fey -- so beautiful. Worth 42 minutes of permanent cringing face. Howevs, NEVER AGAIN. EVER.

Montreal, My Hands Are Getting Cold

Holy shitfuck guys, it's December. I wrote this on November 14th. Obvs I had just read 'America'. I don't know what I want.

Anyways, urgent matters to discuss before you read this poem. Remember when Maine happened? Ironically I used a line from 'America' as the title of that post, and today America, more specifically New York, fucked up again. The NY senate voted no on gay marriage, which is incomprehensibly lame. Read about it on Autostraddle and share your feelings.

Basically I just like to write about cities a lot, now read this about Montreal.

++

Montreal, do you hate me?

I can't figure you out.

I don't think I can talk to you right now.

I might cry and that would be embarrassing.

Montreal, I'm writing your name down.

Montreal, I'm making this real.

Montreal, you're ignoring me.

Can you hear me, Montreal?

I can't figure you out.

Would you like me to wave?

Would you like me to close my eyes?

Is this a game we're playing?

Montreal, you didn't tell me.

Montreal, should I stop asking questions?

I can't stop asking questions.

Is this too unbalanced?

Am I tipping the scales?

Montreal, I'll never be able to refine this.

Montreal, you're never going to read this.

I'm going to make you read this.

Montreal, I'm going to make you care.

I can't make you care.

Montreal, would you like me to leave?

I tried to leave.

Montreal, you wouldn't let me.

Who are you, Montreal?

I can't figure you out.

Montreal, I'm making this real.

Montreal, I'm ending this now.

I can't end this now.

I can't start anything either.

Montreal, I'm stuck.

Montreal, I want to cry.

I'm going to cry in front of you.

I'm going to smoke next to you.

Montreal, would you like a cigarette?

Montreal, would you leave me alone?

Leave me alone.

I'm tired of you.

Montreal, I never see you.

Montreal, you're everywhere.

Montreal, are you ignoring me?

Montreal, I want to leave,

but you left first.

Montreal, it wasn't fair.

I gave you chances, Montreal,

you didn't take them.

Did my opportunities come up short?

Montreal, am I good enough for you?

I'll never be good enough.

Montreal, I'm better than you.

Montreal, I'm stronger.

Montreal, my hands are getting cold.

I'm tired of waiting.

Montreal, you never came.

Montreal, you never met me.

I walked home in the morning.

The morning made my hands cold.

Montreal, do you have pockets?

Do you want a cigarette?

Are you ignoring me?

Montreal, I swear I saw you last night.

I swear you saw me too.

You looked right through me, Montreal.

Between St. Laurent and Mont-Royal,

Montreal, the sidewalks are full.

I walked the sidewalk down St. Laurent.

Montreal, you were on the sidewalk too.

Montreal, I broke the rules.

Montreal, I came outside and you were gone.

Where are you, Montreal?

Are you ignoring me?

Do you want me to leave?

Do you want a cigarette?

Montreal, I don't think you care about me.

I care about me.

Montreal, this is never ending.

Montreal, I'm trying not to cry.

Did you see me last night?

I was trying not to cry.

I walked home in the morning.

Montreal, my hands are cold.

Montreal, I don't think you're listening.

Are you listening?

Montreal, you're no good for me.

Montreal, give me a fucking chance.

Ask me a question, Montreal.

Is this too much?

Montreal, I'm stuck.

Montreal, I cried.

Montreal, I tried.

You didn't try.

Montreal, you ran away.

You left me standing here.

Montreal, my hands are cold.

Answer me, Montreal.

Montreal?

Don't wait up for me, Montreal.

I'm staying out late tonight.

America, This is the Impression I Get From Looking in the Television Set

Yesterday Maine voted to ban same-sex marriage. I'm tired and my heart hurts. Someone asked why we still hope when we lose so many battles. The answer is because these are our lives. No one is going to accept being a second-class citizen. No one is going to lie down and die. Hope is the only thing we have. Why do I care? I live in Canada, votes in Maine don't legally affect me. But Maine is part of the world, and so am I. And I... well, I care about other people. I want to go to Alex and Riese's wedding one day. It would be so simple.

Alex: "I can't believe we have to 'win' equality."

++

But you'll fight and you'll make it through

you'll fake it if you have to

and you'll show up for work with a smile.

And you'll be better,

and you'll be smarter,

and more grown up and a better daughter

or son and a real good friend.

You'll be awake, you'll be alert

you'll be positive though it hurts

and you'll laugh and embrace all your friends.

And you'll be a real good listener,

listen real,

you'll be honest, you'll be brave

you'll be handsome, you'll be beautiful.

You'll be happy.

- Rilo Kiley "A Better Son/Daughter"

++

I speak the pass-word primeval, I give the sign of democracy,

By God! I will accept nothing which all cannot have their

counterpart of on the same terms.

- Walt Whitman "Song of Myself"

Imagine all the people, living life in peace.

In Which I Scan Random Things And Talk About How THE FUTURE IS BRIGHT!

On Friday I'll be on a long train ride to New York. On Saturday I'll be driving to DC to participate in the March on Washington which should be a fun new experience as I have never really held signs or shouted things with a real purpose before (such is the quiet, Canadian life). We here at the shoreline receding believe in equal rights for all human beings and illegal aliens (and in case you're wondering, we are also pro-choice and think that polygamy should be legal). Really, I just wanna marry kcdanger and move to NYC.

I'll be going with autostraddle.com and if you are a reader then I hope to see you there, and if you're part of the team then I hope to tackle you in a giant panda hug.

It's unlikely that I'll be posting again until next Wednesday or Thursday because I'll be very busy trying to make the world a better place. You can make the world a better place too, go tell someone you love them and mean it.

Since I have nothing much else to say right now, here are some scans of shit I found on my desk and a picture of me which I'm sure you will love. Also I think scanned things look cool.

++

the price of a one way ticket from penn station to nanuet is $8.50. i never used this because i got lost. clearly nj transit is NOT the way to go.

does that say papaya? how we communicate at autostraddle


to-do list. only one thing crossed off. decided that cleaning my whole room was too ambitious and just went for the desk. did not even complete that. #fail.


notes for moxie fucking crimefighter post


another to-do list in which i fail epically at actually doing things.


brooke explains how business works.


CHILD PRODIGY
now you know how much cuter i used to be.

the future is bright, my friends.
Have a good thanksgiving weekend!

Other Books I'm Reading

Okay, last time I read three books and was in the middle of reading the second Redwall book, Mossflower. Since then I've finished it, read the next one, Mattimeo, and then read three more books. That makes a total of 8 books (see? I can count). If anyone would like to suggest something to read, that's nice, put it in the comments and I'll add it to my list.


The Life of Pi by Yann Martel

My dad bought The Life of Pi for $2 at a garage sale. This is a book that won a very prestigious award (which means nothing to me) and other things, rave reviews, blah blah, and claims that it may make me believe in God. Doubtful of that I read it anyway hoping to be entertained for a bit. It made me lose a couple hours of sleep during the middle of the book when I absolutely couldn't put it down, but the beginning was a bit long and uneventful and I found the end disappointing. Overall it was a good story but yeah, that's it. And even though I have weird/mixed feelings towards God, it did not make me believe in him I don't know why someone would claim that.



On the Road by Jack Kerouac

This book made me feel high. Like I physically felt like I was on drugs when I read this. Some of my friends have said they only want to read On the Road when they go on a roadtrip. Obviously I didn't do that. I like the idea of re-reading it if I ever go across the country -- one of my favorite things about books is that reading it a second time is always different than the first. I'll probably be in a different place (metaphorically and physically) when I read this a second time and I can't wait to see what new meanings it will hold, because this book has a lot of meanings and secrets waiting to be found in its pages.

"I could hear an indescribable seething roar which wasn't in my ear but was everywhere and had nothing to do with sounds. I realized that I had died and been reborn numberless times but just didn't remember especially because the transitions from life to death and back to life are so ghostly easy, a magical action for naught, like falling asleep and waking up again a million times, the utter casualness and deep ignorance of it."


The Well of Loneliness by Radclyffe Hall

If you didn't gather from the title, this book is fucking depressing. It's at times long and brutally honest. It also provided comfort and made me angry, made me weep, made me shameful but also proud, it evoked a self-pity but also pity for the world which can be so horrible, and it humbled me. I can't explain it in any other way except to say that this book made me feel.

"Our love may be faithful even unto death and beyond -- yet the world will call it unclean. We may harm no living creature by our love; we may grow more perfect in understanding and in charity because of our loving; but all this will not save you from the scourge of a world that will turn its eyes from your noblest actions, finding only corruption and vileness in you.

Because there is only toleration for the so-called normal. And when you come to me for protection, I shall say: "I cannot protect you, the world has deprived me of my right to protect; I am utterly helpless, I can only love you."

The Muscles Fought so Long to Control Against the Pull

Today is a big day for someone. Not for me, but for someone else. I'm just going to bear witness to it, I'm going to clap and drink and hide in the bathroom. I hate socializing. People are going to touch my hair and ask me when I'm going to the olympics. They'll point at my tattoo and ask me if it's real. My grandmother will probably make that "tchh!" sound and face and turn away -- why would you ever do something like that to yourself? I'll smile politely. Get another drink. Disappear for extended periods of time -- no one will notice me, it's a huge gathering, I'll just be off there in that gray area, stumbling around. If I had internet on my phone I would maybe live blog. But I don't, so I won't.

Today is the happiest day ever for someone. Right now. I wonder what they think as they wake up? Will I ever think those same thoughts? I don't think I could, knowing what I know and feel and see. It's just not fucking fair. Yesterday I woke up and couldn't feel my fingertips. I had a dream that someone's head was cut into 4 pieces but don't worry 'cause then she got up and killed her brother. I wonder what the happy people dream about.

Today is the greatest day ever for two people, given the opportunity to share their lives together. For others, today is another day denied equal rights, denied understanding and compassion, denied acceptance, denied as being humans. Today is another fight to live their lives as free, honest, loving, caring, etc. people. For some people, today is a day circled on the calendar. This is going to be an anniversary, a celebration -- a cele-fucking-bration! What the fuck are we celebrating? How come only some people get to celebrate? How come only certain people get to be happy? I know -- because everyone is equal, but some are more equal than others.

I cannot go to this wedding with a clear conscience.

--------

[tegan and sara - i was married]

and read this because you should.

---------

[edit at 1:35 am maybe drunk maybe iu;lk erase and edit this tomorrow probs not[

my thiughts and feelings re: guinuine heterosexual weddings. i think all weddings are genuine. i mean you don't get married thinking that you're gonna break upo with them in a year -- the moment itself is comepletey geniuine and honest and real. regardless of what really happens in 10, 20, 40 years, if they have affairs or have 2.5 kids but really end up hating each other -- they're not getting married with these thoughts in mind. the're thinkling it's gonna be the opposite. they want to beat the odds. that being said, i enjoyed myself qwuite a b it. i wish that i was not such a complete social retard but it was nice because maybe you know thst things like this make me cry. i told you this right? i cry at the olympics and it's not an athlete thing. i'm an idealist in the truest form and though i hate that being straight is super normal and being gay is frowned upon, i'm happy for them. and it doesn't even matter what i think because even though the bride and groom wanted to shasre this day with us it's really about them and they're in love and they don't need our permission. i'm an idealist and i believe in love so i'm glad they celebratied this. i guess the real thing that kills me is that people want to deny thi s same happiness to other people. i mean not in canada, in canada gays and lesbians can get married. but in the majority if the world gays and lesbains are prosecuted and stuff. but i think if these two peple, my cousin and some other guy, if they can fall in love and they want to make this commitment, however silly and caked with religious garbage, why can't anybody else. i think the way we see marriage now in our society is obviosuly not a handing over of the bride as property from one man to another, it's a promse that two peopl are makign to each other to love each other for a really long time, i dont think ti's a religious thing anymore, i eman i don't see why it should be cause they're in lvoe and that's so great and i'm so happy for them kinda i mean i just think they're lucky and i'm glad i was there cause every once in a while i need a reminder that there is good in the wrold. i like to see honest happy people. it makes me cry thinking about it watching them walk down the aisle i mean maybe nedt may 31 who knows what we'll be doing but they're gonna be remembering today. and i don;'t think they'll remember everyone who came or what songs were played or what food they ate. but they'll probably rememer being happy. even if may 31 2010 means they;'re in a fight or the dolphins are exgtinct or there's a power outage, today, tonight was somethign else. i am happy that tonight was full of love and happiness. i only wish that it was more easily shared. it's not fair that part of the world is denied this simple feeling. and i mean just that. i don;t know maybe sometimes it seems hard and stupid, love i mean, feels like it deosn't make sense. but then when you have it for real, like this, it is simple. it is so simple. and life is complicated, always, but love can be simple so why people try to steal its simplicity is beyond me. it cold be so simple.