Sometimes This Is All I Know

Day 24. To the one whom I cannot name; thank you. You don't know who you are, but maybe you will one day. To the one whom I cannot name; I had a perfect idea and this is it. Sometimes this is all I know.


I love you like a character in a book,
one who will never change because your soul
is pressed forever in the pages, but
will also grow as I grow, and I will learn new things from you
as I learn new things about myself.
This love is a constant discovery.
I love you because you jump with me.
I love you because you take me everywhere. We fly
everywhere together, you in my mind,
it's not a guest bedroom, it's a shared room.

I love you more than flowers, which remind me of my mother,
more than tulips and roses, more
than the memory of gardening in the front of the old house,
because you are here now,
you are real.

I love you more than love,
which I love a lot because it is the thing that has kept me safe
in the darkness of my room.
Love reminded me that I was human,
it kept me attached to the earth when everyone else
had let me go. It reminded me that I can feel,
that I'm alive.
I love you more than that living feeling,
more than the ropes that tied me to the ground,
because you are the ground, you are the earth.
You keep me grounded, you let me fly.
You take me out, you take me home.

I love you because you are the sky and
I love to light fireworks across your skin.
I love you because I don't know you
and I want to get to know you.
You attract me, you intrigue me, you make me curious,
you make me want to know what it's like behind your eyes.

I love you because you're not mine,
I love you because you're all I have.

I love you more than Saturday morning,
more than photographs because I never
need to remember anything when I'm with you.
Who needs memory,
I only remember the curves of your wrist,
I only remember nothing at all about you, but
I love you.
I love you more than memories.

I love you more than a character in a book
which I love a lot, I love books a lot,
I love you more than reading them.
I love you more than the ink on a page that will never change,
only stain.
I love you because there's more to you than
26 repeated letters in different combinations.
I love you more than books.
I love you more than reading
and writing
and reading my writing because truthfully
there is little honesty in these words.
I love you the way I say I do,
I simply do not know who you are.

I love you more than birds, which are free
and love is free and boundary-less.
I like you more than that.
Birds are tangible,
three-dimensional,
edible.
Love is quick to catch fire,
sparks,
embers burn long into the night.
I love you longer than night,
longer than the spread of eagle's wings,
the length of light from the sun on water.
Love is not so measurable as the sky,
which has limits,
but not the mind, which is so easily interrupted
but steady in its perseverance.




"Though I know I'll never lose affection
for people and things I've loved before
I know I'll often stop and think about them
in my life, I've loved you more.
In my life, I love you more."
The Beatles - "In My Life"