Rummaging for Answers in the Pages

this is a story.

i thought that i was the loneliest person on the planet
then i started listening to other people and realized they're all lonely too and i thought it was strange that everyone is the loneliest person on earth so why can't we be more kind
i'm going to be more kind to strangers from now on
plus thank you please don't break my heart but

everything breaks my heart and makes me cry
i know there needs to be more love in the world but sometimes i just hate other people

so please just be honest with me tonight and tell me how you really feel
do you love somebody
are you hungry
do you wish you were 7
or 21
i stopped making promises when i realized how unrealistic they are
it's kind of just like a lie you tell to get people on your side so please just be honest with me tonight and tell me how you really feel
at the start of every page i get the chance to write straight
everyday is another chance to write in a straight line
or you could fuck it up

on wednesday i took the bus and as soon as we got on the highway it started rocking back and forth like a boat. i was scared. people were looking around, confused. i looked at them. there was an old lady with cats on her socks and an elderly man who looked like he smoked cigars and a really really really cute girl who looked like she was in an arts program at concordia and a middle aged woman and a fat guy who sat on my right reading about village formations in the northern southwest and a girl on my left studying spanish. i thought all these people looked nice and i didn't feel so scared anymore. i wouldn't mind dying in a bus full of these people. but we didn't die, and i was late for school.


[edit: i totally saw the girl at dawson and got freaked out 'cause i wrote about her in my blog.]