Friday, March 13, 2009

I Have A Lot Of Feelings, That's Why I Have a Blog

I try really hard to do my homework but I get distracted by pictures of Penelope Cruz.

Stars make me feel really mellow and sad and heartbroken. Not a bad heartbroken, more like an accepting heartbreak; sometimes the world is just like this. If I had just gotten out of a hard breakup, I would listen to Stars and cry a lot. I didn't just get out of a relationship though, so I'm listening to Stars and enjoying it. I feel like they have a lot of feelings. I have a lot of feelings too. Some of my feelings are:

1. i am tired
2. i hate french homework
3. my brain has no punctuation
4. i am tired
5. i owe people money and i have no money that is why i borrowed money
6. does anybody have money they want to give me

I think about time a lot. I get thrown off if things don't go according to plan and I make plans, small plans but plans nonetheless and I am bad at finishing them. I have plans to eat breakfast in 20 minutes and brush my teeth in 5 and get dressed in 20 and that's 45 minutes that's why I get up 45 minutes before I have to leave but I never leave on time. I like moments when I stop thinking about time. When I think about time it means I'm not in the "now" it means I'm somewhere else, it means I'm nowhere, it means I'm making plans that I can't follow through on.

"And it came to me then, that every plan is a tiny prayer to father time." - Death Cab for Cutie "What Sarah Said"

I think there is a lyric or line for every feeling I've ever had. I think this is a thesis statement and I will go about proving it. Also I think this reinforces my view that feelings are universal and that all people, all humans share the same feelings i.e. love is not discriminatory so stop being a jackass and judging others because they look/act/are different from you and stop taking away my rights, you narrow-minded dinosaurs.

I just realized that this can go way in depth; like the level of feelings ("I hate you", "I despise you", "I hate you so much that I would not even feel bad if you died", "I dislike you", etc.) so this could probably take forever and I haven't posted in like 4 days and I have to write a stupid philosophy paper and I only had 5 hours of sleep last night and no one reads this anyways and the l word sucks balls and tomorrow's the last day before spring break, we're going to celebrate.

A celebration of death: "don't you weep, don't you weep for them. there is nothing as lucky, as, easy, or free." - bright eyes "easy/lucky/free"
Also another good death celebration song is "The Great Gig in the Sky" by Pink Floyd, except there aren't really any lyrics.

Celebration of life: Hakuna Matata! Obvs.

Annie let's not wait

I think I'll stop there 'cause celebration is all we need, let's celebrate some more. The world is really great so let's celebrate. MORE DRINKS! MORE PARTIES! MORE LAUGHTER!

also I'm sorry this post is all over the place and it's 2 days overdue and I'll try to be better I promise and next time is going to be about something, I swear.


k.c. danger said...

I agree thoroughly with numbers 5 and 6.

Time terrifies me, but you know that.

And yes, there is an enormous depth to feeling. Someone once tried to talk me into discounting the value of feelings because they essentially are just a series of chemical reactions. And yeah, that may be true, but it really only serves as evidence that humans are meant to feel. Emotion is wired into our DNA. We're programmed to love. Weird.

Anyway, another good song is "What I'm Trying to Say" by Stars. I feel like it's especially relevant to this post because when I saw them live, the way that they introduced the song was by yelling "THIS SONG IS ABOUT FUCKING AND DEATH." I'm not going to lie, that song is perfect.

I wish to see you again.

riese said...

have you ever read achtung baby, it's a blog, and i think you would love it if you don't already.

saint modesto said...

katrina: that's like when people remind me that stars are burning balls of gas millions of miles away - it takes away a lot of the magic.

riese: thanks, i will defs check that out.

k.c. danger said...

I think I may have conveyed my point incorrectly. What I meant was that, while on a superficial level, reasoning things through science seems to take away the magic, it's actually more incredible that we're just made that way. It proves that emotions are real and legitimate etc etc. But that's just me.

saint modesto said...

Oops, yeah I see where you're coming from now. I tried to respond to this but I ended up backspacing a lot because I think I ended up arguing the same thing as you.